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In the movie “The Five Year Engagement”, the lead actors Emily Blunt and Jason Segal are madly in love and eager to get hitched. They delay their wedding after Emily gets a job outside their state. They insist that they are committed to each other, but for some reason, they find it difficult to get married. What was the problem? Well, nobody knows. Agreed, it is just a film, but look around and you will see the same plot reflecting on the lives of many couples you know.
Four or five decades ago, most engagements lasted two to six months, but today many women are engaged for several years. Does this mean that marriage is becoming less important? According to the 2010 census data, only about 30% people aged between 18 and 35 are married. However, many of them are in a long term relationship.
Why are young adults becoming indifferent about marriage? Well, there are several reasons for this. For one thing, being unmarried is no longer stigmatic. Many women now work and earn money. They don’t need to get married to boost their financial or social status. Still, for many of them, getting engaged to their boyfriend is a great milestone and a reason to celebrate. They don’t mind it if the engagement period lasts indefinitely because they never get tired of basking in the prenuptial glory. And you can’t quite blame them. The added benefits of engagement, for example, the attention they get from their family and friends, is too irresistible to part with. Better still, engagement allows them to be in a relationship without having to deal with the hassles of marriage.
That said, many couples in a long-term relationship will happily get married if they have enough money to cover the marriage expenses. A fairy-tale wedding is not affordable for many couples; but they don’t want to settle for anything less. In that case, they will wait until they save enough money to splurge. This can take several years.
While there is absolutely nothing wrong with staying in a long-term relationship, experts are of the opinion that delaying marriage can undermine the sanctity of a relationship. If people stay in engagement for a long time, others may interpret it as a lack of commitment. This will ultimately prove detrimental to their relationship. But that’s what the experts say. I say do whatever your heart desires – as long as you two are happy with each other!